And 6 weeks it is

So I have been officially having my pregnancy days. I knew I shouldn't have jinxed myself with the "I feel great!" talk. I have been nauseated, TIRED, my neck is killing me and my attitude turns on a dime. I haven't been eating too much as nothing sounds good but I eat anyway thinking that it will make me feel better. Nope, it doesn't. I wish I wasn't working right now. I can barely keep my eyes open and I hate being on the verge of barfing or burping (from the 7-UP) while I talk to clients. I do still go to the gym. I think it helps my mind and my energy level for the next day. I am off of coffee. YAY! It doesn't even sound good anymore. Plus the decaf was grossing me out! So water and crystal light have been my drink of choice! =)
Seriously though, it feels like a nagging flu bug that wont hit or go away. I get motion sickness very easily and it feels like I just got of a carnival ride. Blech!

But I must remember that it is not about me... it is about my 6 week Itty Bitty!
Mamma's trying hun, mamma's trying. Seriously, I would love to feed you salads and fruit but when the only thing that sounds good are graham crackers... well you get stuck with the left overs.

Another week down!

Tomorrow will be six weeks already! Even though these next 9 months will go by very slow, the last few weeks have already flown by!
So pregnancy has taken a toll on me. Only a little bit though. I am very drowsy, especially in the mornings, and I am getting a little nauseated and dizzy at times. It seems to help when I eat every few hours in the morning until I have a big lunch then I am fine for the rest of the day and night. My sleep at night has not been the greatest. I seem to wakeup a lot, toss and turn, and have a hard time falling asleep again. Marc is in Wenatchee on business the next few days and I know I will be especially lonely under the blankets, but if Lilly is lucky she may be able to sleep with Mamma! Lilly is also noticing the excitement and we are so lucky to have such a caring and protective dog. She is constantly looking at me, whining and wagging her tail. I ask if she is ready to be a big sister and her little head cock is the cutest reassurance for me! I cannot wait until Itty Bitty is old enough to play with Lilly. She loves kids in general and she will make a very loyal, 4 legged big sister.

Little Itty Bitty has a heart beat now! *hopefully* And is the size of a pea.
My first appointment is on the 4th of March and that may be a little too early to tell still. I just hope Itty Bitty is healthy and loving life in me right now. I am trying my best to provide the best atmosphere for Itty Bitty and trying to keep myself hydrated and healthy at the same time. I really would like an ultra sound but again I am unsure if it is still too early to see anything.

Why do I feel so good?

Ok, let me rephrase that.. I feel good!
I read on other mommy to be blogs and I am always reading forums and people seem to be hit with symptoms early. Could this be mental for some? Knowing that you SHOULD have morning sickness, headaches, bloating, etc. Is it leading to puking?
Maybe I am just being confident and yes, cocky, but seriously I feel like myself right now! The only thing I have noticed is I am craving certain foods. Salty foods have been satisfying my palette and I am going through a cheese phase; extra sharp please!
Marc has been wonderful as well. He continually talks to Itty Bitty, making sure we are doing ok, asking me if I need anything and calling just to say he loves me. =)
I know he is the reason I am not scared to death right now. Knowing he is going to be here watching over us, always and forever. I couldn't be doing this with out him. He is my shoulder, my hand warmer and my teddy bear.

Happy 5 weeks, Itty Bitty!

Look how big Itty Bitty is getting! The size of an apple seed! I think it has Momma's eyes and Pappa's nose... what do you think? hehe
I have been feeling pretty good. I do get tired but I have cut my caffeine habit down to 90% and I notice if I don’t eat every few hours I get a little light headed and famished feeling. The bloating feeling is still there and I think it is also caused by water retention. However I retain water any ol' day so nothing new here. I still am going to the gym at night which seems to help my mood and overall feeling of being healthy.
I remember watching some friends in the past eat and eat and eat and completely diminish their health during their pregnancy. Not caring with they ingest and how much. Of of them gained as much weight as she should have through her whole pregnancy just in her first trimester! I know some take pregnancy differently and when cravings come the COME HARD but it is also about self control and knowing what is best for you AND the baby. Does the baby need deep fried foods? On occasion but not everyday.
Simply put: I am very scared of the weight gain. More so then the birth itself. I just know my body type and I know it will not be easy to get rid of the remaining weight. But knowing that we are going to be getting married next summer I think that will be extra incentive for me to get back to my healthy body type.

The weekend went as planned!

Yesterday was a success!
First, the Rabbi was such a pleasure to meet with. He is a very genuine, kind individual and both Marc and I felt very comfortable around him. The good news: we won’t have to be married before Itty Bitty is born and I won’t have to complete the conversion process before Itty Bitty is born either. At three months we can perform a Jewish ceremony and Itty Bitty will become Jewish.
I was very nervous before meeting with the Rabbi. Marc and I have been together over two years and believe me marriage has been talked about ever since the start. And there still is no denying that we will be married soon, but I couldn’t possibly think of the added stress of a rush wedding while I am pregnant. Marc already knows that I am not going to look fat or pregnant in my dress: no way. Plus, do we need to be married? Love is in our hearts and it has always been there and will always stay. We tossed around the idea of going to the Justice of Peace and doing a small gathering, waiting for the baby to be born, then throwing a huge ceremony next year. It is not to appealing to me. I want my wedding my way. I guess it would be different if we were already in the middle of planning a wedding for this summer, then we could just bump it up a few months but we haven’t started at all; and again I am not going to want the added stress on me and Marc. We will be dealing with enough: finding a house, saving money, doctor appointments and so on.
On to the second part: the surprise visit to my Mom! =)
It couldn’t have been better! My dad was already there and luckily my mom was in the shower when we arrived. We all hugged, talked, laughed and sat in the living room waiting for mom to emerge out of the bathroom. Dad finally called her out of the bathroom. She was so surprised to see us there! She screamed then ran back in the bathroom but appeared seconds later with hugs and hellos. I quickly grabbed her, sat her on the couch and gave her her little gift bag. Marc and I were standing up in front of her holding each other and smiling. She opened the blue package first, stared at it for a few seconds then looked at my and asked if I was pregnant. Our faces were gleaming with happiness as we said yes. She was so thrilled! Shocked, but thrilled! She is already starting to plan baby showers, looking at baby items, and I love it! But so am I! Every time I go into a store I hit the baby section and look at the newborn items. I want to start buying things but it may be a little early. I guess unisex items are ok: bottles, onesies, diapers, etc… but I know once I start I won’t stop!
I am coming up on 5 weeks already! Itty Bitty is the size of an apple seed, can you believe it!

One more time

Yup, it is confirmed. I had to see for myself one more time because there is always that off chance that there was an error. Plus, seeing the word "pregnant" made me finally realize that indeed I AM PREGNANT! So many thoughts, so many feelings; and even though our little Itty Bitty is the size of a grain of rice, I am so in love!
Marc was in Tacoma the last 2 days for the Washington State wrestling tournament. I missed him badly and I wanted him to hold me tight, but it was nice to have time to reflect and think... Oh and SHOP! For those you that know me, I never ever shop. But I had good reason and I felt I deserved it. :)
I am a crafty person at heart and you don’t want to know the millions and millions of ideas that are running through my head right now, but I did accomplish a few things that were on my list.
One, I am making a journal for our Itty Bitty. Writing our thoughts, our actions and documenting the first months together. I am sure this is a process that will go on for a while even after the birthdate. I love archiving and what better way to represent this than to journal especially for someone so precious. It will be in the nursery on a book shelf, along with my very own pregnancy journal to document my feelings, changes and history in the making.
I also picked up a book for Marc to prepare him for what I will put him through. (I've heard it is not so good!) So when mega bitch comes out to prey on her victim, he will know that I love him with all of my heart but... maybe not at that exact moment. In turn, I bought a pregnancy book explaining week by week of what I should expect and how to cope with my bodily changes. As long as I can prepare I will be A-OK.
Oh, and I also bought Jenny McCarthy's Baby Laughs. This was a very easy read, I did it in 2 hours, but funny and witty as hell! Would you expect anything else from her? I learned so much and I was very relieved to see that these feelings, changes, cravings, bloating, puking, you name it! happens to EVERYONE. Thank gawd. And her down to earth, tell it like it is, truth about every little thing is very appreciated!

I surprised Marc with a little present tonight after he got home.

Here is what was in it:

I couldn’t help it! I saw it and I had to get it for him!

He is not a frequent reader but I hope he reads this. At least it will help him to prepare for MY rollercoaster of a time!

And of course I could not forget the Stars of the Show! They really deserve an award considering we tried only twice and it was right after Aunt FLow left in January! Which I hear is not the best time to try anyway...

So what is next on our agenda?
Tomorrow we are meeting with the Rabbi to talk to him about the conversion.
AND afterwards we are going to surprise my mom with a little visit as well! Boy is she in for a treat!
My dad already knows; I called him minutes after finding the test positive. I had to tell someone and he was thrilled! He is so excited to be a grandpa to my child... but I do have to admit that it is rather strange to think of him as a grandpa.
My mom on the other hand I wanted to do more for. I was thinking of the best way to tell her and I came up with the best idea!

A little pink present!

How adorable is that! No words needed by me, I will just let her open it and start screaming!

Plus this cute book on becoming a Grandparent. Tomorrow will be a wonderful day!

And so there was 3...

February 14th.
This day has meaning to everyone; good or bad.
When in love, it seems this is OUR day. A day to bond, a day to share, a day to connect and a day to love.
When not in love, it is torture. A day to hate, a day to end and a day to not remember.
For some, this may be a day to mourne and to remember the past. Keep in mind that with every memory there is an equal memory waiting to happen.
This day was our memory.